ok this spoke to me on so many levels, right down to the "violent white man’s voice crooned softly from my speakers" - that is an incredibly important detail, and I only recently realized that I grew up absorbing so much art made by white dudes and it definitely shaped how I see the world and myself... and the older I get, the more I unconsciously gravitate towards art by women, black artists, trans artists, as if I finally recognized that my vision of the world has many gaps that I seek to fill. also, it's curious you mention the age of 27, because for me, when I was a child, I held this same age as some arbitrary adulthood marker...like, I will be married and have kids when I am 27. well, I am 29 and I don't, and it's ok, but a part of me is still stuck in the childhood/teenage mindset and it's as if I haven't evolved some adulting expectations I have of myself with how my life has shaped since I actually was a teenager. anyways, I loved your writing, it was so perceptive and nuanced and I'm looking forward to reading more!
oof this one resonated real hard. in the last few years i've had a hard time recognizing whether i've been descending back into my teen self or if my teen self has never left and just forced its way into my adulthood. self-perception is so tricky but i'd like to think as long as we're manifesting (or still discovering) our truest self, then why not embrace the complexities of what being a "grown up" means for ourselves. also, absolutely loved frances ha when i first watched it, especially the scene where she debates whether to take money out of the ATM after seeing the $2 or $3 charge. been there!!! (still am)
Becoming a Real Person
ok this spoke to me on so many levels, right down to the "violent white man’s voice crooned softly from my speakers" - that is an incredibly important detail, and I only recently realized that I grew up absorbing so much art made by white dudes and it definitely shaped how I see the world and myself... and the older I get, the more I unconsciously gravitate towards art by women, black artists, trans artists, as if I finally recognized that my vision of the world has many gaps that I seek to fill. also, it's curious you mention the age of 27, because for me, when I was a child, I held this same age as some arbitrary adulthood marker...like, I will be married and have kids when I am 27. well, I am 29 and I don't, and it's ok, but a part of me is still stuck in the childhood/teenage mindset and it's as if I haven't evolved some adulting expectations I have of myself with how my life has shaped since I actually was a teenager. anyways, I loved your writing, it was so perceptive and nuanced and I'm looking forward to reading more!
oof this one resonated real hard. in the last few years i've had a hard time recognizing whether i've been descending back into my teen self or if my teen self has never left and just forced its way into my adulthood. self-perception is so tricky but i'd like to think as long as we're manifesting (or still discovering) our truest self, then why not embrace the complexities of what being a "grown up" means for ourselves. also, absolutely loved frances ha when i first watched it, especially the scene where she debates whether to take money out of the ATM after seeing the $2 or $3 charge. been there!!! (still am)