ok this spoke to me on so many levels, right down to the "violent white man’s voice crooned softly from my speakers" - that is an incredibly important detail, and I only recently realized that I grew up absorbing so much art made by white dudes and it definitely shaped how I see the world and myself... and the older I get, the more I unconsciously gravitate towards art by women, black artists, trans artists, as if I finally recognized that my vision of the world has many gaps that I seek to fill. also, it's curious you mention the age of 27, because for me, when I was a child, I held this same age as some arbitrary adulthood marker...like, I will be married and have kids when I am 27. well, I am 29 and I don't, and it's ok, but a part of me is still stuck in the childhood/teenage mindset and it's as if I haven't evolved some adulting expectations I have of myself with how my life has shaped since I actually was a teenager. anyways, I loved your writing, it was so perceptive and nuanced and I'm looking forward to reading more!
ok this spoke to me on so many levels, right down to the "violent white man’s voice crooned softly from my speakers" - that is an incredibly important detail, and I only recently realized that I grew up absorbing so much art made by white dudes and it definitely shaped how I see the world and myself... and the older I get, the more I unconsciously gravitate towards art by women, black artists, trans artists, as if I finally recognized that my vision of the world has many gaps that I seek to fill. also, it's curious you mention the age of 27, because for me, when I was a child, I held this same age as some arbitrary adulthood marker...like, I will be married and have kids when I am 27. well, I am 29 and I don't, and it's ok, but a part of me is still stuck in the childhood/teenage mindset and it's as if I haven't evolved some adulting expectations I have of myself with how my life has shaped since I actually was a teenager. anyways, I loved your writing, it was so perceptive and nuanced and I'm looking forward to reading more!